Staring down the barrel of a shot gun…

So friends, today marks 8dp3dt. For those not fluent in infertility that means I am 8 days past a 3 day embryo transfer. All that is on my mind is my beta(blood test which tests for pregnancy). I am trying to keep a strong mind and positive attitude but let’s face it, it’s hard. I can only think about the message I will be listening to next Tuesday from the nurse. That message determines my future, as well as my emotional state afterwards. I am preparing for negative and positive. If it’s negative, I’ll probably definately cry. If it’s positive I don’t even know if I will believe it, and then I’ll cry. So either way it looks like I should have a box of Kleenex by my side.

We have already decided to do another fresh cycle of IVF right away. Crazy as that may seem, I don’t think I could wait. In my opinion, we gave this cycle our all but we can do better. There are other protocols. We could get embryos, maybe better quality, and maybe we could do a Day 5 transfer instead. I read somewhere a couple of months ago that the average tries to success of IVF per couple is 2-3. I laughed when I read that before and thought that there was no way, but after what I learned this cycle and what we had to go through, I get it.

Also, I want to take a test so bad it’s taking everything in my core not to pull one out. My nurse stressed to me yesterday to NOT take one. It doesn’t help that I have 10 cheapies sitting in my closet right now.

beauty-quotes-8

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